mindy kaling's book is a delight: funny yet surprisingly profound at certain turns. i loved the chapter on 'men and boys', finding myself resonating with some of her revelations and confessions. here's a great excerpt:
Until I was thirty, I only dated boys, as far as I can tell. I'll tell you why. Men scared the shit out of me.
Men know what they want. Men make concrete plans. Men own alarm clocks. Men sleep on a mattress that isn't on the floor. Men tip generously. Men buy new shampoo instead of adding water to a nearly empty bottle of shampoo. Men go to the dentist. Men make reservations. Men go in for a kiss without giving you some long preamble about how they're thinking of kissing you. Men wear clothes that have never been worn by anyone else before. (Okay, maybe men aren't exactly like this. this is what I've cobbled together from the handful of men I know or know of, ranging from Heathcliff Huxtable to Theodore Roosevelt to my dad.) Men know what they want and they don't let you in on their inner monologue, and that is scary.
Because what I was used to was boys.
Boys are adorable. Boys trail off their sentences in an appealing way. Boys bring a knapsack to work. Boys get haircuts from their roommate, who "totally knows how to cut hair." Boys can pack up their whole life in a duffel bag and move to Brooklyn for a gig if they need to. Boys have "gigs." Boys are broke. And when they do have money, they spend it on a trip to Colorado to see a music festival. Boys don't know how to adjust their conversation when they're talking to their friends or to your parents. They put parents on the same level as their peers and roll their eyes when your dad makes a terrible pun. Boys let your parents pay for dinner when you all go out. It's assumed.
Boys are wonderful in a lot of ways. They make amazing, memorable, homemade gifts. They're impulsive. Boys can talk for hours with you in a diner at three in the morning because they don't have regular work hours. But they suck to date when you turn thirty.
- Mindy Kaling, Is Everyone Hanging Out With Me? (And Other Concerns)
my mantra now that i'm comfortably situated in my mid-30's: "date men, not boys."
cups of coffee: 3
mood: relaxed
Monday, September 2, 2013
Sunday, August 25, 2013
bliss-filled blur
one official week of summer left....it's been a happy blur. just the thought of recapping everything seems overwhelming, so instead i'm slapping photos on here to summarize my summer since it's more fun to look at images anyway.
all photos taken by author, not to be used or reproduced without permission
cups of coffee: 1
mood: full heart
all photos taken by author, not to be used or reproduced without permission
cups of coffee: 1
mood: full heart
Sunday, June 23, 2013
milestones
so i graduated....
...and started working here.
life just got insanely busy and deliriously real.
cups of coffee: 2
mood: happy-tired
...and started working here.
life just got insanely busy and deliriously real.
cups of coffee: 2
mood: happy-tired
Wednesday, April 17, 2013
happenstance?
two friends ran the boston marathon on monday, both slated to finish around 3 pm when the explosives went off. one friend planned on pushing his two young sons in a jogging stroller to the finish line, but ended up running slower than anticipated and was two miles away when the explosions occurred. another friend was running bandit and tracking his run with his phone, which he lost around mile 14, so he stopped. these seemingly small, and perhaps even irritable gestures at the time became merciful acts of protection in retrospect.
for many people, circumstances did not work out to their physical protection on monday. a delayed minute or two there, running faster or slower, deciding to watch the race or not that day, caused them their life or their limbs. choices that seemed insignificant ended up monumental.
we can call it many things: happenstance, coincidence, fate, luck. but at the end of the day, we are struck by this hard realization that our independent actions are actually not so independent after all - we are woven into a greater tapestry, and our action and inaction affect others and vice versa. what we think we have control over is frighteningly uncontrollable.
every moment matters - let us be conscious of that. but let us not live in fear but in faith. for those who subscribe to belief in a Higher Power, one that is sovereign and loving, we are able to walk through the moments of our lives with confidence. we ultimately have no control, but a God who is all-powerful and gracious does. and even in times of darkness and devastation, we can cling to the knowledge that in Christ, this is a God who entered that darkness and suffered as well. He did not shy from persecution and death but plunged right into the heart of it and emerged victorious from the tomb. this is a God who does not avoid suffering but chose to endure it. most importantly, He triumphed, giving us a way to triumph as well.
this is my consolation as i continue to grieve with those who grieve in boston and around the world. we cannot ignore the reality of pain and suffering, but we also need not be crushed by it. we do not know how our actions will play out or how our days will unfold, but if we can trust in a greater glory and a higher hope, then we know that all things - even when they are very, very awful - can still work out for good.
cups of coffee: 1
mood: mourning
for many people, circumstances did not work out to their physical protection on monday. a delayed minute or two there, running faster or slower, deciding to watch the race or not that day, caused them their life or their limbs. choices that seemed insignificant ended up monumental.
we can call it many things: happenstance, coincidence, fate, luck. but at the end of the day, we are struck by this hard realization that our independent actions are actually not so independent after all - we are woven into a greater tapestry, and our action and inaction affect others and vice versa. what we think we have control over is frighteningly uncontrollable.
every moment matters - let us be conscious of that. but let us not live in fear but in faith. for those who subscribe to belief in a Higher Power, one that is sovereign and loving, we are able to walk through the moments of our lives with confidence. we ultimately have no control, but a God who is all-powerful and gracious does. and even in times of darkness and devastation, we can cling to the knowledge that in Christ, this is a God who entered that darkness and suffered as well. He did not shy from persecution and death but plunged right into the heart of it and emerged victorious from the tomb. this is a God who does not avoid suffering but chose to endure it. most importantly, He triumphed, giving us a way to triumph as well.
this is my consolation as i continue to grieve with those who grieve in boston and around the world. we cannot ignore the reality of pain and suffering, but we also need not be crushed by it. we do not know how our actions will play out or how our days will unfold, but if we can trust in a greater glory and a higher hope, then we know that all things - even when they are very, very awful - can still work out for good.
cups of coffee: 1
mood: mourning
Tuesday, April 16, 2013
boston love
you are a city that's been so good to me - you took me in as a young adult, as i tried out my fledgling wings and learned to stand on my own two feet. you gave me my first true experience of community, from lifelong friends to a church that i still call home. you challenged me, encouraged me, showed me beauty in acts of human flourishing. you still hold for me pockets of quiet retreat, old haunts that i'm always happy to stomp around.
yesterday, someone decided to perform an act so horrendous, so atrocious, attempting to gut the joy out of one of your most cherished traditions on a day that celebrates not just you but our nation. o, boston, my heart is heavy for you. i grieve with you as you grieve the loss of loved ones. i demand justice be laid with a strong arm on the perpetrators. i seek comfort and solace for those who are hurt and frightened.
but you are resilient, boston. you are a tough city and you always have been. most of all, there is a God who is sovereign and merciful, and He is ever present to heal the wounded and bind the brokenhearted. He has not forgotten you, even in this present darkness, and He will bring forth your light again.
mood: sad
yesterday, someone decided to perform an act so horrendous, so atrocious, attempting to gut the joy out of one of your most cherished traditions on a day that celebrates not just you but our nation. o, boston, my heart is heavy for you. i grieve with you as you grieve the loss of loved ones. i demand justice be laid with a strong arm on the perpetrators. i seek comfort and solace for those who are hurt and frightened.
but you are resilient, boston. you are a tough city and you always have been. most of all, there is a God who is sovereign and merciful, and He is ever present to heal the wounded and bind the brokenhearted. He has not forgotten you, even in this present darkness, and He will bring forth your light again.
Copley Square, photo taken by Eva
Museum of Fine Arts, photo taken by Eva
cups of coffee: 1
mood: sad
Saturday, April 13, 2013
and there was much rejoicing
7 1/2 months of research and writing....almost 8 if you count some of the work that started in the summer. 30 sources cited of various mediums and sizes, from books to online articles. countless cups of coffee.
blood, sweat and tears...well, apart from a few paper cuts, mostly sweat and tears of fatigue.
finally. it's finished. all 76 pages of it, from cover to cover.
printing out my master's thesis on archival paper and sticking it in one of these special binders felt quite archaic in this digital age, but i admit there was also something extremely satisfying about creating something tangible and feeling the weight of my labor.
i've learned so much throughout this research process, and for this i'm very thankful.
now it's one step closer to graduation......
cups of coffee: 1
mood: free
blood, sweat and tears...well, apart from a few paper cuts, mostly sweat and tears of fatigue.
finally. it's finished. all 76 pages of it, from cover to cover.
printing out my master's thesis on archival paper and sticking it in one of these special binders felt quite archaic in this digital age, but i admit there was also something extremely satisfying about creating something tangible and feeling the weight of my labor.
i've learned so much throughout this research process, and for this i'm very thankful.
now it's one step closer to graduation......
cups of coffee: 1
mood: free
Tuesday, March 26, 2013
*hope*
this year, my final thesis draft week (aka crunch time aka crazy town) happens to coincide with holy week.
which makes this poem all the more appropriate.
“Hope” is the thing with feathers
which makes this poem all the more appropriate.
“Hope” is the thing with feathers
“Hope” is the thing with feathers -
That perches in the soul -
And sings the tune without the words -
And never stops - at all -
And sweetest - in the Gale - is heard -
And sore must be the storm -
That could abash the little Bird
That kept so many warm -
I’ve heard it in the chillest land -
And on the strangest Sea -
Yet - never - in Extremity,
It asked a crumb - of me.
march was quite a doozy....looking forward to april, where changes are in the air!
cups of coffee: working on first
mood: fatigued yet hopeful
Monday, March 18, 2013
all that is gold
“All that is gold does not glitter,
Not all those who wander are lost;
The old that is strong does not wither,
Deep roots are not reached by the frost.
From the ashes a fire shall be woken,
A light from the shadows shall spring;
Renewed shall be blade that was broken,
The crownless again shall be king.”
― J.R.R. Tolkien, The Fellowship of the Ring
Not all those who wander are lost;
The old that is strong does not wither,
Deep roots are not reached by the frost.
From the ashes a fire shall be woken,
A light from the shadows shall spring;
Renewed shall be blade that was broken,
The crownless again shall be king.”
― J.R.R. Tolkien, The Fellowship of the Ring
river of gold, instagram, me
cups of coffee: 2
mood: pensive
Wednesday, March 13, 2013
inexpressible
Though you have not seen him, you love him. Though you do not now see him, you believe in him and rejoice with joy that is inexpressible and filled with glory, obtaining the outcome of your faith, the salvation of your souls.
- 1 Peter 1:8-9
i'm weary. please, Lord, let this be true today.
cups of coffee: a lot
mood: tired in so many ways
- 1 Peter 1:8-9
i'm weary. please, Lord, let this be true today.
cups of coffee: a lot
mood: tired in so many ways
Friday, March 8, 2013
unexpected beauty
this is a view from the office where i work....and this picture was one of those one-in-a-million shots on a day when the lighting was perfect. i actually gasped when i saw this and scrambled to grab my iphone and snap a shot before the moment passed. completely unadulterated, no filter.
unexpected beauty. thank God life is full of these moments.
also - i'm obsessed with the old water towers in this city. OBSESSED. i'm often in danger of tripping over my own feet when i'm walking down the street because i can't stop looking up to admire these remnants from another age, perched like ancient guards, watching this city speed along.
cups of coffee: 3
mood: busy busy
unexpected beauty. thank God life is full of these moments.
also - i'm obsessed with the old water towers in this city. OBSESSED. i'm often in danger of tripping over my own feet when i'm walking down the street because i can't stop looking up to admire these remnants from another age, perched like ancient guards, watching this city speed along.
cups of coffee: 3
mood: busy busy
Saturday, March 2, 2013
circus
the circus, marc chagall
sometimes, this is what life feels like....colorful, chaotic, melancholic undertones but also achingly beautiful....strange sadness mixed with delight....
two more weeks until this current grueling schedule ends.
four more weeks until i hand in the *final* draft of my thesis.
mood: wistful
cups of coffee: 2
Friday, February 22, 2013
data, data, data
'data' is the magic word these days as every industry is trying to validate what they are doing and why. and the whole idea of impact measurement is like a golden ticket in the non-profit art world...except it's not always the right kind of ticket.
this is the crux of my master's thesis: the disconnect between what data can measure and the realities of how art can benefit communities. it's not just about trying to measure what might be immeasurable according to current criteria and metrics; it's also about providing organizations with the right questions and tools that a) actually prove useful and can be consistently utilized over time and b) enable them to understand how to gauge their own program effectiveness and communicate that information to funders in a way that's coherent.
it's like i'm swimming in these issues, to the point where i can't stop thinking about it. i am obsessed.
measuring impact is a hot topic right now, and here's a great recent post by david brooks in the nytimes about why data collection and interpretation can be not only inaccurate but actually insufficient:
http://www.nytimes.com/2013/02/19/opinion/brooks-what-data-cant-do.html
love this quote:
"One of the points was that data is never raw; it’s always structured according to somebody’s predispositions and values. The end result looks disinterested, but, in reality, there are value choices all the way through, from construction to interpretation."- David Brooks
at the end of the day, it's not just about the answers you seek but the questions you ask (or don't ask).
cups of coffee: 3
mood: nerding out
this is the crux of my master's thesis: the disconnect between what data can measure and the realities of how art can benefit communities. it's not just about trying to measure what might be immeasurable according to current criteria and metrics; it's also about providing organizations with the right questions and tools that a) actually prove useful and can be consistently utilized over time and b) enable them to understand how to gauge their own program effectiveness and communicate that information to funders in a way that's coherent.
it's like i'm swimming in these issues, to the point where i can't stop thinking about it. i am obsessed.
measuring impact is a hot topic right now, and here's a great recent post by david brooks in the nytimes about why data collection and interpretation can be not only inaccurate but actually insufficient:
http://www.nytimes.com/2013/02/19/opinion/brooks-what-data-cant-do.html
love this quote:
"One of the points was that data is never raw; it’s always structured according to somebody’s predispositions and values. The end result looks disinterested, but, in reality, there are value choices all the way through, from construction to interpretation."- David Brooks
at the end of the day, it's not just about the answers you seek but the questions you ask (or don't ask).
cups of coffee: 3
mood: nerding out
Monday, February 18, 2013
"he's my brother; he ain't heavy" *
31 years. not much has changed.
happy birthday to my favorite brother!
cups of coffee: 2
mood: good
* this is in reference to some lyrics of an old song that is often used in hokey family/christian imagery. which, of course, my brother and i mock mercilessly. to this day.
Saturday, February 16, 2013
internship
this semester, i'm interning with an organization called no longer empty, a non-profit arts organization that revitalizes unused spaces around the city by curating temporary art exhibitions coupled with thematic community programming. the workload is running me ragged - i'm coordinating several events - but i'm LOVING it. thank God for my days at twocities.....all that event production experience is coming in handy.
here's a visual smattering of some of the events i've been involved with so far....
and i get to work with and meet some pretty darn cool people. can't complain.......
cups of coffee: 2
mood: tired but thankful
here's a visual smattering of some of the events i've been involved with so far....
"the wedding": an interactive theater performance where audiences participated in various wedding-related transactions with the actors
"amorama": part of a monthly family day series with workshop activities for children
"immigrants are tax contributors": a participatory performance art piece with immigrant movement international
and i get to work with and meet some pretty darn cool people. can't complain.......
cups of coffee: 2
mood: tired but thankful
Wednesday, February 13, 2013
"call me maebe"
if you're an "arrested development" fan, then these mock-up valentines on flavorwire may be the BEST THINGS EVER.
this makes me want to give out valentines to everyone i know. and also to strangers.
cups of coffee: 2
mood: laughing
lent-ing
it's officially ash wednesday and the start of lent!
last year, i gave up alcohol, chocolate and dating for lent.
this year, i'm giving up 2 of those 3 again.
guess which two?
in other news, i'm ready for spring break.
cups of coffee: numerous
mood: i need a massage
last year, i gave up alcohol, chocolate and dating for lent.
this year, i'm giving up 2 of those 3 again.
guess which two?
in other news, i'm ready for spring break.
cups of coffee: numerous
mood: i need a massage
Sunday, February 10, 2013
thesis-ing
i care so much about my thesis. SO MUCH. more than i need to.
is it because i'm a type-a-asian-american-oldest-child-of-an-immigrant-family? is it because i'm an obsessive perfectionist when it comes to my work?
or is it because i love my topic so much and believe (probably naively) that i may be able to prove some assumptions and develop some tools that can prove radically beneficial to the non-profit arts sector?
whatever it is, sometimes it hurts to care this much.
mood: uggggghhhhhhh
coffee: 2
is it because i'm a type-a-asian-american-oldest-child-of-an-immigrant-family? is it because i'm an obsessive perfectionist when it comes to my work?
or is it because i love my topic so much and believe (probably naively) that i may be able to prove some assumptions and develop some tools that can prove radically beneficial to the non-profit arts sector?
whatever it is, sometimes it hurts to care this much.
mood: uggggghhhhhhh
coffee: 2
Thursday, February 7, 2013
wowzas
yesterday, tom finklepearl spoke in one of my classes about public art and community.
today, richard armstrong spoke to another one of my classes about the guggenheim brand.
i'm in awe.
cups of coffee: 3
mood: ahhhhhhhhhhhh
today, richard armstrong spoke to another one of my classes about the guggenheim brand.
i'm in awe.
cups of coffee: 3
mood: ahhhhhhhhhhhh
Wednesday, January 23, 2013
what. the. what.
which actress would i want to play me in a movie? tina fey.
who is my celebrity crush? paul rudd.
AND THEN THEY MADE THIS FILM TOGETHER.
it's like my dream just came true.
cups of coffee: 2
mood: time for bed
who is my celebrity crush? paul rudd.
AND THEN THEY MADE THIS FILM TOGETHER.
it's like my dream just came true.
cups of coffee: 2
mood: time for bed
Monday, January 7, 2013
age...
facebook friending some of the first-year students in my program. shocking realization that some of them are 10 years younger than me.
TEN YEARS. that's one whole decade.
gosh, i'm old.
cups of coffee: 2
mood: old
TEN YEARS. that's one whole decade.
gosh, i'm old.
cups of coffee: 2
mood: old
Sunday, January 6, 2013
a review
2012 was a doozy of a year and, as per my annual custom now with the ushering in of a new muji planner, here's a review of the year in highlights. to mix it up a bit this time, we're going backwards! here goes....
december
- a wonderful family christmas with new niece, baby z. yes, i have become a crazy auntie.
- handing in over 50 pages of my thesis prospectus. tendonitis? check.
- dear friend chelsea comes to visit! gallivanting off to boston for a fun new year's with friends.
november
- 2 thanksgiving dinner parties with friends. gratefully gorging.
- accidentally deleting 7 months' worth of blog posts - BLERG! but reminiscing with great joy and thankfulness.
- after months of church-hopping, finally deciding to commit to redeemer downtown as my church here.
october
- hurricane sandy! or superstorm sandy, depending on who you talk to. fortunate to be spared but heartbroken at the devastation suffered by my new york neighbors. volunteered for a day with friends on staten island.
- dressing up as rainbow brite and the color kids with friends for halloween. possibly one of my proudest costume moments ever.
- east village eats tasting tour! big sigh of relief as i finished this project for my internship.
september
- starting my second (and final!) year of grad school. o, joy and slight panic.....
- birthday celebration with viv! raised over $1300 in my birthday campaign for many hopes.
august
- retreat with the volunteer leaders of many hopes. so privileged to work alongside these amazing folks.
- jazz age lawn party!
- the birth of my beautiful niece. i'm already smitten and i haven't even met her yet.
july
- VIP tent tickets for the met opera summer stage in central park. thanks, tracy!
- watching 'spiderman' on the intrepid! hooray for free summer films in nyc.
- 'twelfth night' in battery park. this city is magic.
june
- coney island mermaid day parade! a dream come true. and i win my first ever carnival game prize: a giant toy husky. the game? whack-a-mole.
- figment on governor's island with art-loving friends mina and randall....it's like being in wonderland.
may
- moved! farewell, park slope. hello, crown heights.
- first year of graduate school finished. WHEW.
- great googa mooga in prospect park. so. much. good. food.
april
- quick jaunt to boston to hang out with my brother, touring boston with a group of his students from shanghai
- school work, school work, school work.....
march
- coordinating a colloquium for school with guest speakers ruby lerner of creative capital and ian david moss of fractured atlas. topic? social entrepreneurship in the arts.
- weekend in the catskills!
february
- macaron-making class
- catching up with mindy and kevin before they make the big move to china
january
- new year's celebrations in boston
- visiting friends and friends visiting
and now we're off to a bright new year. welcome, 2013.
cups of coffee: 2
mood: relaxed
december
- a wonderful family christmas with new niece, baby z. yes, i have become a crazy auntie.
- handing in over 50 pages of my thesis prospectus. tendonitis? check.
- dear friend chelsea comes to visit! gallivanting off to boston for a fun new year's with friends.
november
- 2 thanksgiving dinner parties with friends. gratefully gorging.
- accidentally deleting 7 months' worth of blog posts - BLERG! but reminiscing with great joy and thankfulness.
- after months of church-hopping, finally deciding to commit to redeemer downtown as my church here.
october
- hurricane sandy! or superstorm sandy, depending on who you talk to. fortunate to be spared but heartbroken at the devastation suffered by my new york neighbors. volunteered for a day with friends on staten island.
- dressing up as rainbow brite and the color kids with friends for halloween. possibly one of my proudest costume moments ever.
- east village eats tasting tour! big sigh of relief as i finished this project for my internship.
september
- starting my second (and final!) year of grad school. o, joy and slight panic.....
- birthday celebration with viv! raised over $1300 in my birthday campaign for many hopes.
august
- retreat with the volunteer leaders of many hopes. so privileged to work alongside these amazing folks.
- jazz age lawn party!
- the birth of my beautiful niece. i'm already smitten and i haven't even met her yet.
july
- VIP tent tickets for the met opera summer stage in central park. thanks, tracy!
- watching 'spiderman' on the intrepid! hooray for free summer films in nyc.
- 'twelfth night' in battery park. this city is magic.
june
- coney island mermaid day parade! a dream come true. and i win my first ever carnival game prize: a giant toy husky. the game? whack-a-mole.
- figment on governor's island with art-loving friends mina and randall....it's like being in wonderland.
may
- moved! farewell, park slope. hello, crown heights.
- first year of graduate school finished. WHEW.
- great googa mooga in prospect park. so. much. good. food.
april
- quick jaunt to boston to hang out with my brother, touring boston with a group of his students from shanghai
- school work, school work, school work.....
march
- coordinating a colloquium for school with guest speakers ruby lerner of creative capital and ian david moss of fractured atlas. topic? social entrepreneurship in the arts.
- weekend in the catskills!
february
- macaron-making class
- catching up with mindy and kevin before they make the big move to china
january
- new year's celebrations in boston
- visiting friends and friends visiting
and now we're off to a bright new year. welcome, 2013.
cups of coffee: 2
mood: relaxed
Saturday, January 5, 2013
ringing in the new
old friends. new friends. art-viewing at museums. chowing down in chinatown. friends performing folk music in new year's eve concert. fireworks over the boston skyline. dance party. a whole lotta laughing.
2013, you're off to a wonderful start.
cups of coffee: 1
mood: happy
2013, you're off to a wonderful start.
cups of coffee: 1
mood: happy
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