ten years ago. planes crashed, buildings crumbled, loved ones lost, world shaken. feelings of invincibility shriveled as fear smothered us. grief spawning rage spawning hate, and back to grief again. fingers grasping for God, for each other, for something to hold on to.
today we paused to remember, mourn, honor and renew. today we publicly grieved for those whose absences are still felt deeply by family and friends. today we reflected on the past decade - how we've changed, how we haven't, the choices we've made, the world we are attempting to rebuild.
i remember that morning, sauntering into work in downtown boston, cup of dunkin' donuts coffee in hand as usual, and noticing the television monitor in the lobby was on. image of smoke billowing, video replay of a plane hurtling towards the tower. i remember shock then disbelief, then profound sadness and cold fear. i remember the evacuation of downtown offices, walking through deserted streets and feeling eerily alone. i remember sitting through a prayer service, uncertain of how to form words, what to ask for, but deeply - desperately - longing for God to confirm His presence with some miraculous, gracious, triumphant gesture.
we remember not because we want to hold onto pain. we remember because in this act of remembrance, we mourn all that is not right, all that should not be. we give grief its space. we do not suppress it, lest it boils to resentment or festers into vengeance. we are not consumed by it, lest we lose sight of hope. we acknowledge it, paying proper tribute.
and then we must persevere. we persevere in love because ultimately, love triumphs. we persevere because this world, as shattered and broken as it is, glimmers with the vision of what could and will be. we persevere holding tight to the hope that someday, all this sadness will be made untrue, that evil will be stamped out, that the dead will rise, that our weeping will turn to joy and tears of sorrow to rivers of gold. we persevere because there is a Redeemer and redemption is happening, and we participate in that ongoing work of redemption.
but today, we took time to remember and mourn. and pray for the peace of this land and for the coming of the world that ought to be.
cups of coffee: 2
mood: pensive
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